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Tuesday, June 30, 2020

Lol

पन पन....... 'पण'
मला तस नव्हता म्हणायच!

;p

lol!

I am going to carry a bubble wrap in the salon that
I go to! So when they use a different towel for everyone!
(which is a waste of turkish towels...explains a lot why we are
a third world country)

I am going to make 'prut' 'prut' sounds out of bubble wraps
and show actual ways of being STUPID!


!

In school when we were enlightened about how girls get the periods..

But we were more worried about we won't be able to 
play Rangpanchami....but the Gods were kind enough
never to confuse the dates with Rangapanchami dates...

It was a laugher out of stupidity pandemic!

Today we are free to make a choice between sanitary napkin brands..

so I was hoping I could explore some illustration styles!

But there is a 'pandemic'!
That the Indian politicians are too dumb to arrange a gynaecologist!

and being appreciated for being 'poised'
May be its the 'poised' ness which is the cause and effect of the 'pandemic'

You know how you smack a TV remote on a cushion to get it work!
I wish I could do that with 3 people at least!

Count how many people do you want to try this with!

Dumb is way too mellow a word! You should hear the adjectives I am
using in my head to describe 'poised' people!

I don't understand does the poised politician has not tried a cup of tea!
Because it resolves most of my issues!

Try to give the poised ness a kick of caffeine!
If even that does not make it resolve it!

THEN I am going to call the poised ness is a pandemic!

Its people who do not drink tea are the ones who are causing the pandemic!

Its like when wending machine refuses to pour chai latte
the feeling is called T- presso!

May be try pouring some expresso! (which is a coffee)
If the machine still does not pour, then by ritual you call it depresso!

(Milk powder does not give a kick) so cannot fix the stupid!

So! This was my press release! I have addressed the nation!

Rest of the day I am planning to laugh out loud till by eyes water!

Do not beg for cooperation! Get a brain!





Monday, June 29, 2020

!

You lift a laptop very carefully!
and you do not write on a doll!

sooo!


Thursday, June 25, 2020

lol

And when people talk about BK Shivani,
खली, वर राहणाऱ्या सगळ्यांचा उद्धार करा.
दाणे देण यालाच दानशूर म्हणतात

wah! wah! wah!

And throw in some 'Robot' jokes,
be sure to receive a 'सात मजलि' appreciation!

And be careful! Because since you are so
worried about your 'child' don't tell them about
the wardrobe malfunction!

Judge and enjoy!

Because correcting them when they wear a capris
is less awkward! As a woman!

Leg finger cleavages are easier to deal with I guess!


;p

मधु  (मध्)  रचनाकराचे 'conduate' असू देत
म्हणजे, म्हणजे म्हणजे आम्बेडकर सुद्धा पळून  जातील
बाथरूम मधून lol

प्रिये मधु इस 'राज़ी'.....Freak show indeed!


lol

विकृतिचे रचनाकार रेस्ट इन पीस!


Something I worked on!


Tuesday, June 23, 2020

;p

Bad things keep happening to good people constantly.
All you can hope for is, when your turn comes,
you will know what to do. And cope with it...
with perseverance.......really thats all you can do!!

:(

Adultery makes me worried
for when I have a girl,
and she gets hit by an asshole,
who belittles his daughter
in front of her...

and if she does not punch the bastard
in its stomach....then I have put out
a bad example!

Then what right do I have to be calling myself a mother!

And to all mothers who only by an eye roll
steer people in the right direction!

Should truly be admired!

Thank You!

Monday, June 22, 2020

:)

If anyone makes me a monitor!
I am telling everyone to make paper airplanes and throw it
around the cubicles! lol!

Whoever makes the most airplanes gets promoted!


lol



















who wants be the rabbit?!
may be 'चिखलु'!?
चिखलु rabbit!

;p

There is a door.
I am calling a goddess name

Like Ambika....Saptashrungi!?
Who knows?!

Some people are doing a hell of a 'job' sticking their
faces!

I could easily call a masseuse to throw some 'मधु'
to remind people of their 'backbone'

You know its a 'spa' feeling!




lol!

'You got promoted!?
Now one day you could become the CEO!'

To which I am like,

Can I be the doorkeeper!?

The biometric is contaminated!

lol!

Plus it has an added advantage.
I can go out in the passage where. there is noAC,
And come in the foyer where there is AC!

Cabins are suffocating!
and being doorkeeper gives me the power not to
reach the cubicle!

Sunday, June 21, 2020

Friday, June 19, 2020

Thursday, June 18, 2020

;p


;p

Nothing personal!
But I hope some people step on a lego!
fall on their face!
and break an onion!

'p

Just out of curiosity,
My uncle was traveling by plane...
and it crossed the bermuda triangle!

Has anyone checked there?

Wednesday, June 17, 2020

!
















lol...salty


!

I am taking a break!
So I can ponder upon the 'choices' I made.
So someday when I have kids they do not dislike me.
Because I worked too much, and 
I am angry with myself because I made 
poor choices in my workplace

I smear in English!





!

Bullies think of problem solving techniques
as a 'BUSINESS'
We are trying to solve a problem!

You are a bully!
who creates anxiety and uses it against people!
to ruin their personal and professional lives!

Friday, June 12, 2020

;p

There is a bee stuck on my leg!

Carry some wet soil from tulsi plant
IF you want to see me ALIVE!

Plant a tulsi!

This!



























and blueberry muffins are for friends
and some peppermint cigars!

sorry!

Wednesday, June 10, 2020

petty


Chandler in Towel





Nice fitting!

Saw some wall stains too!


;p

Yes! Thank you for 'congratulating' me
and NOT accusing me of doing things I did not do!

Its 'Inspiring'

Have a great year! I guess!

!

'Privacy is power'
and some people know
how to use it against people
so well!

Without any shame!

I am yawning in FVC class!

!

phases जातील!

Chemistry will always shock me!

I hope it gets hit by a lightening this year!

!

Just remember who patted on your head!
When you were working Very hard!

It was a palm!

Dear, Naidu!




Tuesday, June 9, 2020

:(

yes! drink that tea!
I have jinxed it!

and NO NEED to be by my side!
there are plenty of people who I will
get defensive and then cry my eyes out!


I will fix my tea cup with fevi quick!

and FYI, witches can hear things
in mind too! You are on a 'witch hunt'



;P

पुणे, मंबई, धकामबा, सगली लोक कैसे 'safe' असतील ?
I have a safety pin in my hand

No one is SAFE!

;p

Dayum!

I have heard it somewhere!

Can anyone tell me whats going on!?

or we have to wait for 'ikbal'?

Monday, June 8, 2020

;p

I am forced to be mean!
People are tearing posters!?

But I found my dammit doll!

I will keep hitting it!


















and may the inventor live happily!

will work on the 'validation' issue!

Sincerely!

;p

If people call Malgudi days 'nuanced'!
I am NOT going to work with them!

I call swami a besan ladoo!
and some people should be punished
for making him look 'nuanced'!

Its like आंब्याच लोणच असत,
अणि beets are 'pickled'!

Its like impressing a person,
who has father issues!

change your glasses those are Gandhian glasses!
I have a copyright on those!

Friday, June 5, 2020

yuk


;p

















And how did you know, someone I know went for a snorkeling trip
Or is that one of your impeccable timing and plan to 'Help Nirzara with the poster and
tear it apart' moments!

You stay AWAY from people I know or I will have you come to Nashik
and feed you to the leopards!

You will be like the dog meat or the bear meat!
Draw yourself, with blood and tattered hair
'everywhere'!

so that your better half can roam around with
bare bellies...crying for your uterus!

Its an open jury and you are DOG MEAT!
'DEVOURED' by your own ill intentions!

what 'Drawing technique'
Don't think that your technique will make me horny!

go to your parents get some perspective in life!

I hope you get slapped by your parents someday!
You deserve it!

;p























Is that my mole!
stop playing John Denver!?

You lived on the fourth floor!
There was 'ample' amount of 'sunshine'

You had to just help someone who worked along with you
in ACT 3 but you 'chose' to play
SUNSHINE!

May be it was your brother's idea!

or your left brain was 'OVERACTIVE'
And you 'dada' was an excuse to fix your stupid broken laptop!

and did he teach you to visualise people naked and show them
like fat sack!? or you just prefer sex with fat-sacks...?!

that you are the 'milk and fat-sack is your 'dada'!

is that how you were 'brought up'?!

Its like your eagerness to come and say to me
'I want to work with you!'

is like a cheap pick up line!

the six months I wasted was the privilege 
to you, that you had a computer!

and I was dead in the lab corridor!


marry some mediocre ass, who keeps visualising you in that glass of milk!

People like you and MC, BC (ABHYA) should be treated like 
'kamwalis!' You deserve that! 

And BC STOP asking questions like 
did prashant - the 3-D faculty ask anything inappropriate to you!?

No you asshole! He was a faculty. and you deserted the lab on purpose.
and I had a promo to finish! Is that the reason you were treated like 
a maid!? I hope I get treat you like my maid!

Stay with your mother Naidu!
If she is sensible!

May be you will learn to draw decent subjects.
and NOT glorify you 'perfect' relationships!

Gau....go...gooooo......gooooooooooo!

And Naidu, what are showing off your AMAZING drawing skills for!?
I cannot draw hands. But you have your left side of the brain activated!

You and nondu tore my poster!? In ACT-2

and now its like, look at me I draw hair much better than Nirzara.

Your colours are like slimy weird coloured minion pukes......
did you tear their poster too?!

Is this what your brother taught you!?

Its like appearing for the jury on blog!

My promo, was lost!
thats why I am angry!

I will try to be not angry.

Sincerely,
Nirzara


Thursday, June 4, 2020

modern family' it's baby boy supras' scene







If you are surrounded by people like this

Its okay to get very mad!




;p

Mumbai मधे  'Bhutia' samajache
anek lok 'उत्सुक' आहेत
मराठी 'बाण्याला' भेटवायास!

मि एकाही निवडणुकी ला वोट केले नाही!

Thank God!

मराठी स्कीम्स मधे washing machines विका आता त्याना!
अणि लेबल पण मराठी लावा!
म्हणजे मराठीत भांडतील मधे तावतावाने
गुरख्याच्या अत्यचाराबद्दल.







!

And the blood stains on the back of their dresses would be
a proof for women having uteruses!

sure the white 'sarees' would get stained! but
ppl will learn about how biology works.




;p

This lockdown brought the 6 month's memories
of the NID 'stop motion' back to me...
everyone looking at you as if you have
committed a horrible crime!

yes I do miss the mosquito sprays!
why they are not coming anymore!?

has someone found an 'आत्मनिर्भर'
technique to repel them...

Oh! No offence but if Shivani roamed around
with a lot of oil on her hair...they would just stay
focussed on one head

THAT way we can boost our egos by getting bit
this time by mosquitoes...
to feel good about ourselves!

and 'oil' companies shall thrive.
who cares about the petrol rates!

roam around with oily heads
may be one day we shall learn to repel
carnivores too...

who needs a two wheeler or four wheelers...

Rolling wheels around the street could be a
new sport!

#NID #DAYS


;p

Enough with the introspection!
It's time to 'fix' the external environment!

कोणाला ईजा हो देऊ नका आशा तोर्यात म्हणतात
जैसे काय मि वाघनख घेऊन बाहर पडते रस्त्यांवर!

'खोदापार्क' वाघनखे 'legacy'

शर्वरी अपार्टमेंट, मोठी भींत
भीतीच्या मांगे sewage!

थोबड़ झाकुन फिरैची वेळ येईल नाहीतर काय!



!?

I threw a beggar's child because
(I was FORCED to adopt child!)
to the leopard to feast on!
was that wrong!

'Enter' the castle....plastic surgery working wonders!

Is the 'new plot'


!

Oh! I am sorry
Drinking, smoking,
taking people's sides
for BEING JERKS...



Wednesday, June 3, 2020

;p

and its shocking that Mayura Datar brings
'puran poli' for me?
Clean your nose with your painted fingers!

;p

Yes! My smoke is too hard to
write down so I keep it on my
walls as a souvenir!

;p









change your face!
or your behavior!


Monday, June 1, 2020

;p

I am just putting my big feet in my even bigger mouth...and work...
mind my own business.