Emily esfahani smith says, her father had a massive heart attack and fortunately, he survived. She asked him what went through his mind when he was facing death. He said, ‘All I could think of was to live for my daughter and son…’ i.e. for Emily and her brother. As the doctors were taking him for an Anastasia, instead of counting backwards he repeated his children’s names in his mind like a mantra. He wanted his children’s names to be his last spoken words on Earth, if he died. And that gave him will and strength to survive.
Emily later says, her father lived a humble life but a good life. Lying there, facing death he had a reason to be alive. And that was ‘Love’! His sense of belonging to his family, his purpose as a dad (father), his transcendent meditation repeating his children’s names, these were the reasons for his survival and THIS is the story he tells himself. That’s the power of meaning. Happiness – comes and goes. But when life is good and situations are bad, meaning gives you something to hold on to.
So belonging, purpose, transcendence and storytelling (the story that you tell yourself based on the things that are happening around you) are the very pillars of our existence!! It fits to our everyday life completely! Very powerful I think!
But as far as the belonging is concerned....when you are different (as for here I mean...when you have black hair and brown skin and everyone around you is white and has blue eyes. THAT different Nothing else ;p) Belonging takes time! like when she was on a summer camp and clicked her first picture with a friend. That's a very big achievement!
In order to get the belonging point working, you either have to be helpful, funny, smart, sweet...anything to be cool to the crowd you want to hang out with i.e. bring out one of your best quality and magnify it :)
But when we label someone as 'Different' (here I mean every kind of different!) , it dehumanizes them, they become the other. They are not worthy of our time, not our problem, and in fact they ';The other' are the cause of our problem.
The best way to stop this is finding out what makes you different! and embracing that, only then you can appreciate what makes other people different. And then you realize that different is really 'Special' :)
lets write down why you are different....you may feel silly, proud, ashamed, or just about anything by looking at it. All we can do is not let our differences define us!!
What makes me different has made me stand out and Be Successful!!!
and that's my new motto :)
And lets remind ourselves that nobody has a claim on the word 'Normal'...we are all quirky and unique and that's what makes us wonderfully special! :)